Friday, 23 September 2011

Wacky Warning Labels


I bought a garden hose nozzle at the local hardware. It had one disclaimer: “Do not spray into electrical outlet.”


My favorite is the one on my birth control package. “Do not use if you plan on becoming pregnant”.


On a children’s cough medicine prescribed for my 5 year old was the warning ‘Do not drive or operate heavy machinery.’


My daughter has been diagnosed as being diabetic. On one of her packs of medication. “May cause loss of consciousness–symptoms–unconsciousness!” Danny


My favorite has always been the one on a hair drier I bought:
DO NOT USE IN SHOWER WHILE WATER IS RUNNING. You need one for your newsletter though: Caution–may stimulate thought and dispell comfortable ignorance !!


On an emergency contraceptive kit (morning after pill) a warning saying not to take it if you’re pregnant; sleeping pills come with a warning that they may cause drowsiness; Antibuse, a med to help overcome addictions (including alcohol) comes with a warning not to drink alcohol with it; straight razor blades which have a prominent marking saying Warning: this package contains sharp objects.”


There were many, many warnings tucked in the operators manual of my laptop. One said: “Do not use while immersed in water.” There’s a sticker on Microsoft keyboards which says “Warning: Some experts believe the use of any keyboard may cause serious injury. Consult statement on the back of this keyboard.” LeRoy As Sweden has so many lakes and waterways there are dozens of official ferries. One of the signs says “STOP–Ferry–this does not apply to vehicles boarding the ferry”. Another one is at the beginning of a Clearway (no stopping or parking) and you can see a bus-stop about 20 yards further on. They have to add a rider which says “Does not apply to buses in regular traffic.” Glenn


The stroller I have has a great one. Under the seat is a basket for groceries etc. and there is a label there to not place your baby in in the basket under the seat! Jen


A woman was suing her pharmacist because he didn’t tell her that the spermicidal jelly she bought was to be inserted before sex. Instead, she was spreading it on toast and eating it like, well, jelly. (I swear I’m not making this up). Her response was, “Who has time to read labels when you’re in the mood?” I never did hear the outcome of the suit, but the general response on our end was “Can you sue someone for being stupid?”


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