The New Priest

A new priest is the first time hearing confessions about Twitter, so he asks the older priest to sit his sessions.

The new priest consults with the pair, then the old distinctions of a priest to ask him to add some of the proposals in the confessional.

The old priest proposes ' you can rub your body and arms overlap chin with one hand. "

A new priest to attempt this.

The old priest proposes ' Try, saying, "I see the most useful," "Yes, go, ' and ' I understand." "How do you feel that?" "

The new priest says these things.

The old priest says, "now, do not think is a bit better than my generation läiskäyttää and said, ' do not fuck with?!? What happened next? ""

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The priest, retirement dinner

The priest was being used at his retirement dinner for 35 years, the municipality. Leading local politician and was the presentation by a Member State which, on the one hand, and gives a little speech, dinner.

However, she was delayed, so the priest decided to say a few words of his own, while they waited for:
"I got my first impression from the first I heard of this yhteislaitumilla a confession. I thought that I was a terrible place. The very first person who came to my confessional told me, he was asked by the police, the stolen TV and was able to lie his way. He had stolen money from his parents, his or her employer had embezzled an affair with his boss's wife, the measures taken to combat illegal drugs and gave the VD sister. I was appalled. But as the days went on I learned that my people, but not all, as a matter of fact, and I had become a fine parish throughout the good and loving people. "…

Just as the priest in his talk, politician, arrived late for apologies is full. He immediately began to make a presentation and gave his talk:

"Never forget our first Seurakuntapappi arrived," said the politician. "In fact, I had the honor of being the first person to go to him for confession."

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A Priest and A Nun

Joke of the Day Posted on | February 12, 2011 | No Comments

A priest and a nun are on their way home from a convention when suddenly, their car dies.

The priest says to the nun “Well Sister, I’m afraid we are going to have to go to a hotel for the night.”

The nun just smiles, and says ” OK, Father.”

They arrive at the hotel to find that there is only one room available. The priest says ‘Well Sister, I’m afraid we are going to have to share a room. I’m sure that under the circumstances, God won’t mind. You sleep in the bed and I’ll sleep on the couch.”

The nun just smiles and says ” OK, Father.”

They check into the room and prepare for bed, the priest on the couch, and the nun in the bed. The priest turns out the lights and goes to sleep.

Ten minutes later the nun says “Father, I’m cold.”

The priest says “OK Sister, I’ll get you an extra blanket.” He gets her a blanket and goes back to sleep.

Ten minutes later, the nun says “Father, I’m STILL cold.” So the priest gets up, gets her another blanket, and goes back to sleep again.

Ten minutes later, the nun says “Father, I’m VERY cold. You don’t suppose that, under the circumstances, God would mind if we acted like husband and wife for just one night?”

The priest answered, ” No. I don’t suppose he would – GET YOUR OWN DAMN BLANKET!”

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A priest and a nun

A priest and a nun on the Convention on the law applicable to their home when their car suddenly dies.

The priest says the nun "Well, I am afraid we are sister go to the hotel for the night."

Nun just Smiles and says "OK, dad.

They must reach the hotel, you'll find that there is only one room. The priest says, "well, I am afraid we are sister shall be divided into the room. I am sure that in the circumstances, God will not mind. A bed to sleep and I sleep on the sofa. "

Nun just Smiles and says "OK, dad.

They check the premises and to prepare for bed, the sofa, the priest and nun in the bed. The priest turns out to be the lights and go to sleep.

Ten minutes later the nun says "Dad, I am cold."

The priest says, "OK, you receive an error message that you can use the sister of blanket." He retrieves his blanket and go back to sleep.

Ten minutes later, the nun says "Dad, I'm still cold." So the priest shall receive his blanket and goes back to sleep again.

Ten minutes later, the nun says "Dad, I am very cold. You do not have assumed that the circumstances of the God mind if we acted like husband and wife only for one night? "

The priest replied, "I don ' t assume that he would GET you own – no DAMN BLANKET ORDER!"

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Taxi-driver and a priest to Die …

He is waiting for a long time and finally St. Peter goes and asks: "why would the taxi driver to go to the highest heaven, and I spoke about my life, all of which is of God, is expected to be a long time?"

St. Peter replies: "when you were speaking to the people in my church, who was in sleep mode. But while driving the taxi driver had all prayed to the Lord! "

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A Taxi Driver and a Priest Die…

He waits for a long time and finally goes to St. Peter and asks: “Why could that taxi driver go to the highest level of heaven and I, who all my life spoke about God, have to wait for such a long time?”

St. Peter replies: “When you were speaking to the people at your church, everybody was sleeping. But when that taxi driver was driving, everybody prayed!”

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Priest Retirement Dinner

A Priest was being honored at his retirement dinner after 35 years in the parish. A leading local politician and member of the congregation was chosen to make the presentation and to give a little speech at the dinner.

However, he was delayed, so the Priest decided to say his own few words while they waited:
“I got my first impression of the parish from the first confession I heard here. I thought I had been assigned to a terrible place. The very first person who entered my confessional told me he had stolen a television set and, when questioned by the police, was able to lie his way out of it. He had stolen money from his parents, embezzled from his employer, had an affair with his boss’s wife, taken illegal drugs, and gave VD to his sister. I was appalled. But as the days went on I learned that my people were not all like that and I had, indeed, come to a fine parish full of good and loving people.”…

Just as the Priest finished his talk, the politician arrived full of apologies at being late. He immediately began to make the presentation and gave his talk:

“I’ll never forget the first day our Parish Priest arrived,” said the politician. “In fact, I had the honor of being the first person to go to him for confession.”

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The New Priest

The new priest is nervous about hearing confessions for the first time, so he asks an older priest to sit in on his sessions.

The new priest hears a couple confessions, then the old priest asks him to step out of the confessional for a few suggestions.

The old priest suggests, “Cross you arms over your chest, and rub your chin with one hand.”

The new priest tries this.

The old priest suggests, “Try saying things like, ‘I see,’ ‘yes, go on,’ and ‘I understand.’ ‘How did you feel about that?’”

The new priest says those things.

The old priest says, “Now, don’t you think that’s a little better than slapping your knee and saying, ‘No shit?!? What happened next?’”

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