What Their Daddy’s Do

Joke of the Day Posted on | January 9, 2012 | No Comments

A third grade teacher asked her students to, one by one, stand in front of the class and tell what their Daddy’s do.

Little Mary went first,

“My daddy is a doctor and he saves people’s lives”

“That’s wonderful Mary. Now how about you Jane, what does your daddy do?”

“My daddy is a lawyer and he puts bad people in jail,” says Jane

“Very good Jane. Ok Johnny, what does your daddy do?”

“My daddy is dead” says Johnny

“Oh, I’m very sorry to hear that Johnny,” said the teacher, “what did he do before he died?”

“He turned blue and shit on the carpet”

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What Their Daddy’s Do

A third grade teacher asked her students to, one by one, stand in front of the class and tell what their Daddy’s do.

Little Mary went first,

“My daddy is a doctor and he saves people’s lives”

“That’s wonderful Mary. Now how about you Jane, what does your daddy do?”

“My daddy is a lawyer and he puts bad people in jail,” says Jane

“Very good Jane. Ok Johnny, what does your daddy do?”

“My daddy is dead” says Johnny

“Oh, I’m very sorry to hear that Johnny,” said the teacher, “what did he do before he died?”

“He turned blue and shit on the carpet”

10 Ways To Tell Someone Their Fly Is Unzipped

1. The cucumber has left the salad.

2. Someone tore down the wall, and your Pink Floyd is hanging out

3. Your soldier ain’t so unknown now.

4. Quasimodo needs to go back in the tower and tend to his bells.

5. Elvis Junior has LEFT the building!

6. Mini-Me is making a break for the escape pod.

7. You’ve got your fly set for “Monica” instead of “Hillary”.

8. You’ve got a security breach at Los Pantalones.

9. I’m talking about Shaft, can you dig it?

10. Men are From Mars, Women can see Your Penis

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Joke Telling Tips That Will Have Them Falling Out of Their Seats

Everyone wants to be the guy that people gather around at parties to tell stories. Being a funny person naturally equates to being popular and it is only natural to want to be liked by people. With that in mind, learning joke telling tips can be the secret to your new social windfall.

There are plenty of things that are funny, but you have to decide what kind of funny you want to be. Are you going to be a storyteller like Bill Cosby or are you going to rapid fire one liners like Rodney Dangerfield? This is important to know because the style that you pull it off is going to be very different.

For instance the storyteller will usually use some type of event in their life that is the basis of the joke. They are merely relaying a funny instance that happened that they think will make everyone else laugh. The trick in the success is letting the anticipation build until just about everyone knows the outcome. When you blurt it out, they have already been waiting to laugh and the room erupts in one big swell.

If you are a one liner, it is all about the delivery of the punch line. Rodney Dangerfield was a master at this and watching his tapes are the best lessons that money can buy. When the joke doesn't work, you have to be able to come right back. If you are not making anyone laugh, you have to come up with a joke about not being funny. It is a vicious cycle.

In all honestly, pulling off one liners is a difficult thing to do. Unless you are a wiz at writing material, everyone has already heard the jokes and you are not offering them anything different. However, while all people seem to experience similar things in their life, funny stories are enjoyable for everyone as you sometimes don't even realize how funny things are.

Remember though, build the suspense until you have them all on the edge of their seats and then let them have it. You are going to see finger pointing and head shaking as they all relate it to something that happened to them. All you are really doing is getting them to laugh at themselves!

To get more joke telling tips check out this review of how to be funny.