Friday, 8 July 2011

Chinese Coffin


A family in the Southern Province of China, were puzzled when the coffin of their dead grandmother arrived from the States. It was sent by one of the daughters.


The dead body was so tightly squeezed inside the coffin, with no space left in it! When they opened the lid, they found a letter on top; which read as follows:


Dear Cousins,


I am sending Ah-ma body to you since it was her wish that she should be cremated in the compound of our ancestral home in Tung Shin. Sorry, I could not come along as all of my paid leaves are consumed.


You will find inside the coffin, under Ah-ma’s body, 12 cans of Yohmeitsu,


10 packets of Swiss chocolates and packets of Chinatown Lap Cheong.


Please divide these among all of you.


On Ah-ma’s feet you will find a new pair of Nike Air shoes (size 10) for Ah boy. Also, there are 2 pairs of shoes for Ah Mei’s and Ah Lien’s sons.


Hope the sizes are correct.


Ah-ma is wearing 6 CK T-Shirts. The large size is for Ah Bak and the others are for my nephews. Just distribute them among yourselves.


The 2 new Armani Jeans that Ah-ma is wearing are for the boys.


The Rolex watch that Lee Ah Bai wanted is on Ahma’s left wrist.


Kiasu Aunty Pei Pei , Ahma is wearing the Tiffany necklace, earrings and ring that you asked for. Please take them.


The 6 white Polo cotton socks that Ah ma is wearing must be divided among my teenage cousins.


Let me know what else you need as Ah Kong also not felling well nowadays. I can send all required things when our Ah Kong goes back too.


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